It's Been a Year: Reflections on Germany

A couple of weeks ago marked 9 years of marriage between me and this guy:

I sure do like him.

That same day also happened to mark exactly one year back in the United States after having lived in Germany.











I know - it's crazy.

It's crazy that we were on a plane with 8 suitcases, 3 carry-ons, 3 backpacks, 3 car seats, 3 kids  and a stroller, moving to a different country on our anniversary.

AND it's crazy that it's already been a year since that happened.  


Life has changed a lot in the last year, and we are still forever connected to what we gained from our life in Germany. We loved living there, and we love that country. 

SO - I've decided to share with you something that I wrote as we were getting ready to leave Germany. We were so completely up-to-our-eyeballs in things to get done as we prepared to move, that I never finished my thoughts enough then to publish the post, but have since done so. Here it is!

December 2017

You guys. 
Our time in Germany is coming to a close, and I have something I need to admit: I don't want to leave.

I've really, really grown to love Germany. It's become my home. My comfort zone.
I love my friends. 
I love the language. 
I love my apartment. 
I love how happy my kids have become here. 
I love the adventure that is living abroad...
I feel comfortable and happy.

It's true - it was not always like this. The adjustment to living here was haaaaard in a way that I didn't even know was possible. Stressful, different, lonely. Actually, it's probably the hardest thing that I've ever done in my life, up to date. 
But you know what? It was hard, but it got better. 

In fact, if there's one thing that I feel like I've learned from all of this, it's that Time is an amazing healer. 
Change is always hard, but give it enough time and things will always get better, and you'll come out on the other end stronger from it. It's always been that way for me, but I guess I just needed a really intense experience to solidify that lesson. And now I can confidently say that I think it has been solidified in my heart forever. 

So yes. I love Germany. And I thought I would just take the time, now, to record for myself and my posterity, some of the things that I love about living here:

The Bakeries

When I say that there's a bakery on almost every corner, I promise I am not over-exaggerating. Sometimes you can see three from where you are standing. And when I say bakery, I mean a shop with quality-best-dang-bread of a bazillion assortments being sold at dirt cheap by people who know what they are selling and are proud of it. Seriously. You can get a loaf with the crustiest crust and the softest innards for less than 2 Euros. You can get seedy, whole-grain goodness, or a loaf infused with walnuts, sunflower seeds, cheese, museli, or whatever. Heavy and hearty, light and airy, baguette, croissant, cheese-ridden, raisins, chocolate - ANYTHING. 
And don't EVEN get me started on the pastries. Nope. Nuh-uh. We'd be here for hours. 

And you know what else? When the bakers see that you're with your little kids, they reach over the counter with a soft, sweet roll or a packet of Haribo gummy bears almost every time. 

You have to be careful in there ;) 

I love German bakeries

The Rhine River
We live just down the street from one of the most iconic rivers in history, and we just happen to live on a particularly beautiful section of it. There's a running path, and smaller, hidden footpaths that lead to secret beaches and give the illusion that you're far, far away from the big city. It's been a welcome relief in the time we've lived here. We love skipping stones with the kids. We love watching the shipping barges go by. We love the way the light comes across the water and through the branches of the willow tree just as dusk begins to settle upon us. It's easy to let hours pass as you sit and soak it all up...as long as it's not too windy. We've loved walking along it almost everyday as we take Bridger to and from school. Not to mention, the early-morning runs along the river have been soul-saving. 

On the grassy by the Rhine, just down the
street from our apartment

On the rocky beach, just below the grassy hill seen from above. We spent countless hours here, watching cargo ships pass, rowers row, collecting, stacking, sorting, skipping, and of course throwing rocks. It was a happy place for us all.

Taking a break on our walk home from school. We
walked/biked this path on the way to Bridger's school.

Yeah. I love, love the Rhine. 

THE FOOD
Okay, so I've already talked about the bread, but that's not the only thing Germany is famous for, right?? 
Um. HELLO. WURST (sausage!!). 
It's so, so good. And there's a bajillion different varieties of it. And it's all delectable. There's a whole 25 meter long section of deli in every grocery store dedicated just to wurst, I swear. 
And then there's the mustard.
And the chocolate.
And the cheese. OH THE CHEESE.
Not to mention the incredibly good produce, and just general higher-quality everything. 
Yeah. I love the food. 
I am even going to miss collecting it in the crazy, unwieldy shopping carts that I so hated at the beginning...

Public Transit:

The girls and I in our seat at the
back of the Bahn. The kids loved
the back because it has the biggest
windows and we could sit across from
each other. 

From our apartment, we walk just 4 minutes to the Bahn (tram? trolly? electric train?), which will take us through, under and around our entire city. It's fairly clean, incredibly reliable, kid-friendly, and just...nice. There's almost always a place to sit, and even a designated location for the stroller. It's also much more efficient and affordable than city driving (and parking!) most of the time. We go, literally, the entire week without using our car. The car is used solely for weekend adventures and taking us to places all the way across the city, such as church, or to visit friends in Kaiserswerth.
 
All this, and you know what else? Riding the Bahn gives me a unique opportunity to do something that's impossible in the car: connect with fellow human beings. People are respectful and courteous, and while most people keep to themselves, occasionally someone will strike up conversation and you're able to remind yourself of the fact that the world is filled with billions of people, each of which has their own story, and most of which are good people you could learn something from.

Included in the people I get to connect with in the Bahn are my KIDS. My kids love the Bahn. Looking out the window. Smiling at people. Sitting on my lap. I get to talk to and play with them while we ride to the park, to the grocery store, to the library, or to Altstadt to visit the best bakery in the city...without having to worry about where to park! 

I love the Bahn.

Kid-Friendly Culture

Germans value children. They're lovely little creatures, aren't they? They also value the people who are currently in the process of raising those little creatures. And you know what's amazing? They show it in a very practical way by putting systems in place that make the lives of the children better, and the lives of the parents easier. 
This leaves everyone happy. 

Picnicing in a park with friends. Note the awesome slides,
plentiful swings and much more you can't see

As my life currently revolves around caring for these tiny creatures we call children, many examples of this I've already mentioned on this blog, such as stroller parking on the Bahn and buses, people giving out bread and sweets to children, and amazing public parks. 

But it goes beyond that. Taking good care of kids is so natural that doing what's good for them (instead of what's inexpensive or easy) is just woven into the fabric of German life. Kids go to Kindergarten (pre-school programs) where all learning is play-based until age 6. They play and play and play, and you know what? They actually DO learn while they're doing it. And not just math and letters: social skills, decision-making skills, and just general fun-having skills. They wear thick, almost indestructible rain boots and "mud-pants" so they can both go outside everyday and GET DIRTY without ruining their clothes.
And the toys don't break. They're quality, sturdy, well-built-to-last toys. And if they do, it's because a kid was PLAAAYING with it. A lot.

And also, they have really cheap ice cream sold by the scoop in the summer-time. I swear that they set that up just for kids...

Honesty

Germans are honest. Again, it's just part of German culture. They follow the rules, and expect others to do so as well. 
For example:
No one...NO ONE crosses the street when the crosswalk is red. No cars in sight for miles? No matter. You WAIT until the walk sign turns on. If you don't, be prepared to be audibly-tut-tutted.
People are honest on the trains. There are no turn-styles in the subways or to get on train platforms. It is expected that you have already purchased a ticket. Occasionally, someone will pop out of nowhere and check that you have a ticket. If you don't, you get a 60 Euro fine. But, I have seen this happen only a handful of times in my hundreds of hours spent on the Bahn here. People buy tickets because they're honest.
People are honest on the road. Traffic laws are obeyed. Seriously - think of any traffic law you sometimes fail to obey...NONE of that happens here.  When two lane are merging, it's done so seamlessly in a "zipper" fashion because, well, it's the law. It's so efficient, and there is virtually NO road rage.
And if you're not being a responsible citizen and you make a mistake? They'll go out of your way to help make sure you know you're doing something wrong.

One morning we were driving to church and a car behind us kept flashing his lights at us. "Did we do something wrong???!" We were pretty sure we were obeying the speed limit and had used all of our signals, followed signs, everything. Eventually he pulled up alongside us at a traffic light and rolled down his window.
"You're lights are off." He said.
It was 9 am. 
"It's a gray, rainy morning and you're in a gray car. You should turn your lights on."
"Oh....Okay." We reply, slowly, slightly and still trying to make sure we understood exactly what he was saying. "Thanks."
He nodded his head, rolled up his window, and was on his merry way.

Honest, responsible citizens. 
And it's not just the laws of the road that are being kept, either - wallets are returned to people. Money is refunded when you've overpaid for something. People chase you down if you've dropped something...and the list goes on.

Rules are pretty cool when they're followed correctly by almost all citizens, we find out. 

The People

Of course. How could I not mention the people we've come to love? You know, we've been so blessed, BEYOND blessed, really. People have come out of the woodwork to reach out to us, serve us, befriend us, and laugh and enjoy life with us, and because of that our lives have been infinitely better here. Friends, neighbors, teachers at the Kindergarten and the Playgroups, people from church, community members, and more. We feel so loved, and have made many friends.
We will miss them.
And while we may not be able to keep these people around with us forever, their influence on our lives will remain.

We have been greatly blessed. 

AND I COULD GO ON FOREVER...

...I really could. There's so much we love about living here. The language, the sturdiness with which houses are built, the good-quality EVERYTHING (almost nothing breaks), traditions, holidays, culture, the ADVENTURES...and on, and on, and on.

There are, of course, other things that I've gained - empathy, appreciation for my family, humility...

I am just so grateful.

We celebrated Thanksgiving a couple of weeks ago, and as I prepared a Thanksgiving meal for 12 of some our closest German friends (who DESTROYED the turkey, mashed potatoes and stuffing, by the way) I couldn't escape the thought that this year I am just overwhelmingly grateful for the opportunity that we've had to live here. 

It's been quite the adventure, and I just don't want the adventure to end yet. 

But, it will. So life goes, and you know what? That's okay.

I've worked hard to get where I am here. I feel like, when I came here, my life in Germany was an overgrown garden full of sticks and dead plants. I worked hard on that garden. I envisioned. I hoped. I sweat and bled, and cried and sweat some more. I nurtured. I learned. I worked and worked and worked.
And over time, with all of that work, a beautiful, comfortable, enjoyable garden has grown. And now it is time for me to leave it, and take my gardening skills to the next patch.